Except that when it's all said and done with, I go home to nothing.
I have to look out for myself sometime.  I have to try.
There's only so much that can be done before something breaks
And I can't tell whether it will be my heart or mind that goes first.
I can't believe how young I am, and how much longer I have to go.
I wanted to outlive everything, once.  I wanted to see what was at the end.
So afraid to die, but so afraid to live.  Now, I might welcome that end,
but I'm still afraid to live.
There's time enough to cry for me after you die; live while you can.
What have I done?  I've ruined it for someone.  It must be me,
because the others are happy.  Fuck.  Fuck fuck fuck.